500 days of [sid] vicious summer

via cinemash. totes stole this from afterellen.

and i hear there’s a charlyne yi & channing tatum version of Dirty Dancing. oh, hell yes.

macbook love

this made me smile

more about "macbook love", posted with vodpod

song of the summer?

this has been my pick for some time now, and i havent found anything that gets even remotely close.  love the video, too. but why the heck is GaGa singing with that clutch??

“they call me Mr. Never-Wear-the-Same-Thing”

ode to wimbledon

the actual byline to this picture in the Guardian UK -- A picture of Ana Ivanovic for no good reason. Apart from the obvious one, of course.

 i wonder if she gives lessons.

forgive, please, a mere simpleton’s
heartfelt ode to all these wimbledons

grass everywhere but not two weeds
the perfect place for growing seeds

scones and mash, and loggers and tea
centre spelled with r before e

fans on the tube hoping perchance
to actually witness bud collins pants

a playing surface not swept, but mown
balls that are always rolled, not thrown

watching back home with bacon and eggs
in london though, they do it with kegs

quick wars, long wars, fought in the night
all waged in predominantly white

drop shots, drop sets, and drops to the knees
it was out! it was in! new balls please

blondes, brunettes and two dozen “ovas”
lot of nobodies and two supernovas

no rain, no gloom, looks good on tellies
but personally, i miss the brellies

a simple quote tossed off nonchalant
seen the next morn in 60 size font

gentlemen announced in the opening brackets
who probably go out and abuse their rackets

a favorite rant that just wont wear is
johnny mac’s, “you cannot be serious!”

brits and scots, all union jack loyals
plumbers and bakers next to boxes of royal

a bet on a brit that’s actually practical
all beneath a roof that’s finally retractible

elegance and style fit for a queen
but really, who puts purple with green?

- rick reilly, transcribed from ESPN360.com

lets play a game at a mildly deliberate pace

garrett’s got me hooked. i will now steal from him. please participate:

via A Deliberate Pace, posted on 30.06.09: The Movie Combo Game

     nickdouglas:

I describe a film plot based on two movies.

You tell me the combined title.

For example:
     Plot: suburban family gets mad at a hairy mountain-
     beast for satirizing them in his roman-a-clef.
     Title: Deconstructing Harry and the Hendersons.

So reblog or comment with an answer to the following, but ONLY if you write your own too.

Plot: Two pot smoking half-wits from New Jersey travel back in time to stop hollywood from making a movie about their comic book character personas.

bullshit:
Answer: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back to the Future
New plot: A delusional young man buys a life-size sex doll over the Internet, and falls in love with her. The family intervenes by sending the doll to a mental institution after an apparent suicide attempt, where she befriends the other patients and battles her personal demons.

lonelysandwich:
Answer: Lars and the Real Girl, Interrupted

A Deliberate Pace:
New Movie Combo: Two young aliens must hurry to get back to their spacecraft with the help of a cab driver in order to avoid capture by an extraterrestrial bounty hunter. While fleeing, despite being on opposite sides, the cabbie and the bounty hunter develop a love that dare not speak it’s name.

and a few Garrett and I just bounced around (yes, his are MUCH more concise than mine. but then again, have you met me??):

Plot 1: A boy’s life is changed forever when his highly unstable mother sends him to live with an even more unstable Jamaican bobsled team. (Garrett)

Plot 2: a young stable boy finds his true love, but she has already been promised to royalty. the lovers are possessed and then imprisoned in toys. Our hero uses his strength and wits as he and his unlikely friends try to save the girl and fulfill their own vendettas against a grossly disfigured adversary. Oh and they get married at the end. (Me)

Plot 3: A dystopian portrait of two 1970s suburban Connecticut families who crew an ill-fated fishing boat. (Garrett)

Plot 4: In this period adaptation, an ex assassin and his wife find themselves stuck in the struggle between upward mobility and suburban conformity. when the couple’s dreams for themselves are slowly abandoned and gangsters come looking for him, the husband takes their child and flees the only life he’s ever known. (Me) or if you prefer: When suburban ennui becomes too much and his marriage collapses, a former hitman takes his son on the run from gangsters intent on murdering him. (Garrett)

Take a few guesses. And post your own.

guess what?

Via Neon Gold:
Marina & the Diamonds - I Am Not a Robot (the apirins for my children Remix)

another fantastic remix. i think i like this one even better than Starsmith’s. 
oh and that video? totally weird, huh?

do blondes have more fun?

 

FINALLY.

proud

in honor of this weekend’s festivities, maybe i will do a post with exclusively fruit-flavored artists. but for now, some tunes to tide you over.

Discovery 
 > So Insane <– download this track now. Seriously.
> I want you back <– RIP MJ

Marina and the Diamonds – I am not a robot (Starmith’s 24 carat remix) <— god, i like this chick. darker than little boots and la roux, super akin to Florence.  Great remix. Love when she sings “guess whaaaat??” Very Ladyhawkesque. These are all good things.

Bonus:
Des Ark – If By “Gay” You Mean Totally Freaking Awesome, “Then Yeah, I Guess It’s Pretty Gay”
<– enough said?  this song came out last spring, i think. and it’s good. not crazy poppy like the name might suggest, but smart and sort of broody but darn, it works. Sort of reminds me of Rasputina or Bif Naked or something along those lines.

as always, if you want me to add you to my [bi]weekly mp3 blast, leave a comment. sometimes it overlaps with the tracks i post here, but most often not.

Can you call a letter “Open” if you’ve already sent it? – An open letter to AfterEllen.com

from: Alexandra Chan
to: afterellentips@gmail.com
bcc: Val Nigro
date: Wed, Jun 24, 2009 at 3:45 PM
subject: nora roberts
mailed-bygmail.com

Dearest Goddesses of AfterEllen,
 
Okay, so i know that romance novels – and straight ones at that – probably go against everything afterellen believes in. and im sure any post about her would probably lead to dozens of lesbians complaining about misogyny and stereotypes and the complete lack of gay characters, not to mention the literary merits (or lack thereof). Regardless, i feel compelled to write in and request a blog post about Nora Roberts and Lauren Collins’ profile in this week’s New Yorker (see attached).
 
Here’s why:

• It’s hilarious – even if you’ve never read a Nora Roberts’ novel, you can appreciate the fact that the woman is tough as nails, sharp as a tack, and smart as hell.
• Nora’s completely self-aware. She acknowledges her writing was much weaker in her early works, and knows she makes some silly continuity mistakes (”You just feel like an idiot“). But with regard to her reputation, she quipped about her futuristic crime story-writing alter ego, “J.D. is offended, but I’m not.” [and added, in a stage whisper,] “She’s a bitch, anyway.” 
• And the woman is damn hard working. Five novels a year. When her kids were younger, she had to tell them, ” ‘Don’t bother me unless it’s blood or fire. And, as they grew more responsible, arterial blood and active fire.’ “  And she doesnt have any help – no assistant, no one to help with research; after all, “Why would you want people in your house?… Then you have to talk to them.”
• also, she has good taste. how else can you explain the bobblehead doll of Spike from Buffy on her desk?
• Collins captures exactly why I (and i assume many others), even as a proud woman loving woman, adore her quick-read novels: “Reading a Roberts novel is like watching a game of tennis between two very good players: it is not so much the outcome of the match but the back-and-forth between commensurate opponents that elicits the spectator’s pleasure.” — sure, the sex scenes are hokey (it was nice to know im not the only one who usually skims them), and they almost always culminate in an unrealistically quick (especially in 2009) marriage proposal, but there’s something incredibly compelling about a confident, entrepreneurial, sharp-tongued heroine and her physically and intellectually equal love interest. plus, there’s usually some murder and intrigue to boot!
• sometimes, and i mean to send Nora an email about this (apparently she’s very good at answering her fans!), i think: if i were to change every pronoun involving the book’s hero from the masculine to the feminine, would the story suffer at all? and the answer is heck no; her stories would work just as well if the male protagonists were women. And actually, it’d even work for the majority of her sex scenes (im totally not kidding about this one. they really arent super graphic). Hmmm, I guess I also need to request some gay peripheral characters. i hear she’s very accomodating. 
• although afterellen is about LGBT visibility, it’s also about guilty pleasures (need i mention the Gossip Girl (!!) recaps?). And Nora Roberts is definitely one of those. But maybe, and just maybe, i think it’s about time i stopped feeling guilty. 

Alright, I admit it. I don’t have a grand conclusion or tidy wrap up to this plea for an article. Or cover story. Or small mention somewhere! (after all, it’s the middle of the work day and i AM working!). However, I’m very interested in whether I’m not alone in this adoration for NFR (yep, her friends call her Nora F-ing Roberts) among the lesbian community. I’d love to hear your opinions on her (especially StuntDouble’s, who though I’m sure hasnt read any of her books, would probably really enjoy them. Try Midnight Bayou, it’s my fave!!), and I’m also completely prepared to see lots of snarky backlash in the comments section. After all, it IS a site for lesbians. And you know how much we like to talk about our strong (and always correct) opinions on absolutely everything (case in point).
 
Much love and loyal AE reading,
Alex

lets do the math

"I want to die at age one hundred and twenty at my keyboard after having great sex."

from Lauren Collin’s fantastic profile on Nora Roberts, Real Romance:

“I hope to write the first romantic suspense time-travel paranormal thriller set in Mongolia dealing with Siamese twins who tragically fall in love with the same woman who may or may not be Annie Oakley”….

… A woman in a police-department sweatshirt approached, holding a copy of “The Pagan Stone.”
“It was awesome,” she said.  “My kids were like, ‘Can we have breakfast?’ ‘I was like, ‘No eating until I’m done!’ “

i knew i wasnt alone.  i just didnt know how not alone i was.  also, how is it that if:

There are more than 300 million copies of Nora Roberts books in print.

Over the last 27 years, an average of 21 Nora Roberts books were sold every minute.

There are enough Nora Roberts books in print to fill the seats of Giants Stadium nearly 4,000 times.

If you place all Nora’s books top to bottom, they would stretch across the United States from Los Angeles to New York City 10 times.

and i have 1,093 friends on facebook (yes, including my mother), at least 1,092 of whom can read (valrider, that’s unless your puppy is literate. in which case, whoa), and lets say 1/2 of are either women or sensitive men… then by the law of large, numerous secret guilty pleasures, how is it that only my cousin Rachel (a darling working mom in Poughkeepsie and sharer of the notoriously “muscular” Chan calves) has ever shared my proud and public adoration of Nora Roberts???? 

Come on, do the math.  ‘Fess up, people.  I know I’m not the only one.

Download the whole thing HERE! 
And a huuuuge thanks to Amy and Liza!!

p.s. Hillary: Muhahahahaaa