blair bear! dorota looks fantastic in her yale gear. and the gay dads!! and the gilmore girl reference, complete with a rory put down!
why would you buy your college-bound daughter a pet? um, coeds hate responsibility.
on chuck: he loves a good tragedy
blair’s response? he’s as dead to me as his dead father is to him.
whoa b, whoa.
ugh serena: what if i get in and blair doesnt? could her head be any bigger?
death by dorota. brilliant.
ew. parents doing it. ew.
and lily wants to bring rufus out. like a puppy!
oh god. poor eric. hearing your mom have sex never has and never will be funny.
i want them young and stable. is chuck ordering women?? can i have one, too?
oh the opera! what tragedy shall become us this hour?
chuck has pink salmon nantucket red socks! cuute.
ha! a joke about doors opening for UESiders. nice. oh, is Dan hitting on the Constance Billard’s newest Shakespeare expert? a teach for america grad? this is ridiculous. you know shes the child of rich lawyers and graduated penn 07. everyone knows private schools dont require any real teaching experience. five bucks says she skipped the text for romeo & j and went straight for the baz luhrmann classic.
EDIT: actually, laura breckenridge went to princeton. huh, how bout that. Lucky tigers.
oh god im old. i dont even know what a 2360 on the SATs means anymore.
vanessa is going to the opera with nate. good lord. this is lame.
what is going on with these phones? are these kids really being texted their college apps results? what IS this alternate universe they are living in??
blair was waitlisted?!?? WTF? and nelly yuki is the new devil.
chuck goes to lily for help. ahh the group scheme!
and the shenanigans? coke in his gym bag? transexual strippers? love it.
what? lily has 20% of bass industries. methinks she’s going to convince chuck to move in to their suite in exchange for her shares. hmmm
i know that patience and trust arent necessarily your strong suit, but youll just have to rise to occasion. am i the only one smelling subtext here?
god this teacher chick is young. still not buying it.
financial aidiots? god that’s good!
i love the ridic accent dean barraby’s secretary gets. it;s new haven, not cambridge.
ohh, a minority shareholders’ meeting… god jack is weasely. is he hitting on lily?? “maybe the two of us could come together in some way“. gross.
ohh grade inflating! GPA freakouts! ohh high school!
blair didnt apply anywhere else?? ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME????? okay, i know it’s hollywood, but this trend of one-school applications in movies / tv is absolutely ridiculous. is the constance billard guidance counselor completely incompetent?
“the bastard is untouchable… time to get dirty…”
this scene was ridiculous: “did you really try to buy anthrax with his credit card?” – – “the black market isnt what it used to be…”
“And you got him on Megans list?” — “If only his apt were a few blocks closer to a playground…”
— god chuck is getting creative. and hilarious. i wish i could say the same for lily.
maybe we can try number 26? crash jack in plane? could be fitting – something tells me Jack Bass would totally pull a Marcus Schrenker
half-priced hustler = rufus? chuck, youre making him sound far more exciting than he actually is.
the chuck / lily relationship makes me want to sing hot and cold. loudly.
b: a new teacher is like a child, it needs to be taught
p: and spanked
anything bad i’ve ever said about penelope, please promptly forget.
cancel the nelly yuki project now!
aww nate and vanessa. same gifts. kisses outside central park. over it.
the vengeance of hell boils in my heart. it reaches a high f, that never happens in opera! i love eric.
in our world people say one thing and expect something else. oh, so true. so very true. (sort of like when you tell your mom you like girls and she says it’s okay but she really means, i hope you still marry a man. just kidding.)
blair’s cronies playing devil and angel – this is ridiculous. dont do it, b! you KNOW this is totally going to backfire and youre going to end up getting screwed out of that spot at yale. and the diabolical laughter! they’re just SO mean! im sort of glad i still have yet to see season one.
spotted: b, hot for teacher. too bad ms carr doesnt remember, the devil is in the details.
ooh, kbell, i like!
vanessa and nate again? oh wow i really dont care.
lily and rufus… okay, i care a little more, but only bc chuck is sort of involved
serena and dan! god blake is absolutely blending into the sofa in that dress! dan being obnoxious and self centered, as always. “what about us, do we still fit?” blah blah blah. this is not marriage, dan. you dont want to go to college with your hs girlfriend, seriously. or else youll never have that collegiate homosexual fling.
ahh compartmentalization. except the only thing going in a box (with a questionably tight lid) is your father, dan, and it’s totally lily’s box.
now, is it just me, or isnt adopting a child (and an incredibly petulant one) usually something you might want to tell the man youre in love with?
“just to be clear, this doesnt make us family, just even.” ooh, well played. adoption, though – i like the way you think, lily.
ticks and stones may break bones, but a poison pen is the best revenge. ahhh the witticisms of josh schwartz! when will he run out of these??
“i cant not act out against people. but im trying.”
ohh no, blair. this isnt going to end well. ms carr was totally a nelly yuki in high school, and she’s never forgotten it.
“i hate losing“. and for once, i agree with vanessa.
whoa jack is one scary motherfucker. and he’s high. lily is talking about repercussions and such! im nervous! save her, chuck!!! oh my god!!
thank god rufus acknowledged how bad his hair looks. totally needed to be said.
aww lily and chuck have a moment! she wants him to fill the void caused by her [un]dead son.
oh, was that too soon??
im just reading the course catalog on brown… mail order dreadlock kit! veganism! satanic rituals! i love it. although, the ppl i knew who went to brown grew up summering on daddy’s yachts. different crowds?
ew, dan and teacher? who goes to brooklyn on their own volition? just kidding, vicky.
ohh this sucks. karmas a bitch, huh blair?
but detention, really?? um, im like 99% sure that would have absolutely no bearing on an acceptance to yale. but hey, i did go to penn, so what do i know?
oh dorota! such concern! “what’s happened, miss blair?”
oh yes, this is going to be good.
“uh oh, is it war?”
Next week: i cannot wait for blair to go black ops all over someone’s ass.