Bonfire of the Vanity
– blair droning on about her bday… blood orange martinis, hottest ever. who are these less attractive chicks kissing her ass?
– eleanor has a new man? i love how blair is just talk talk talking him up. wallace shawn is ALWAYS a surprise. (he never means any harm, he’s just lacking in… charm)
– ohh jenny. never trust a model who lives with her mother. dont you know she’ll do anything to claw her way out of that black hole?
– ahhhh wallace is SO cute
– “it’s a death trap!…a guy starts out in his blue period and everything’s great but it;s only a matter of time before he’s all into cubism and it’s some other girl’s eye coming out of her forehead” – god, leighton gets THE best lines
– dan humphrey is the biggest douchebag ever. seriously. who does this kid think he is??
– jenny humphrey on the streets?? good lord. it’s a good thing her eye makeup makes her look so tough.
The Magnificent Archibalds
– bart bass checking up on Eric’s bf?? auhghg i kind of LIKE bart. this is bad.
– okay, if aaron were actually upset about serena’s drinking – double standard! the guy’s a dog!
– aww i ❤ eleanor. and god, i live for these rare blair-jenny moments. i really need to watch the first season so i can see how they ever got to this point in the first place
– ohH! gayface moments… and here’s vanessa, ruining it all.
– auughh happy family at the waldorfs!
and again, vanessa is hella obnoxious.
but where’s bart?? aww he’s all alone tonight!
– okay, there’s NO way that turkey could be cooked THAT fast. SO fake.
– ahhhh wait, bart appears. sinister as ever. but it turns out vanessa is just as bad. god i hate that girl. tampering with mail is a felony, hello!!!
two weeks: bart’s dead, im sure. vanessa tries to sabotage the nate / jenny thing even more. lonelyboy begs for scraps. the lily / rufus relationship drags on even further.
the only things im really looking forward to, though: wallace shawn being a total sweetie and further reducing the waldorf ice queen to a likeable puddle. chuck and blair getting it on. so hard.